State of the Union Address

Wow – mention my job search, ur, um, sex life and I get more comments than ever! Sort of like in real life. I’m gratified that you are all so happy that I’m satisfied (ahem) but I thought I’d throw in a teensy bit of clarification.

As a single mom, I am now out in territory that can be pretty tricky. I have a fairly huge amount of concern about how what I do affects my daughter. As I’ve said before, I’ve learned primarily from watching others make mistakes, and then trying hard not to do the same. One kind of behavior that I’ve witnessed over the years is women who parade a stream of men through their lives, introducing each one as their boyfriend, and having their kid(s) meet and get used to each one, only to have that relationship end and the next one begin. It leaves the kids with a lot of confusion and abandonment issues. It can leave kids feeling like no one is worth getting attached to and there is no point in feeling invested in a relationship.
Since M’s dad is essentially out of the picture, and certainly out of the state, I don’t have any child-free nights to call my own. I traded sanity for a convenient babysitter, and don’t have any family nearby that I would leave my daughter with. We haven’t been here long enough for me to have established a babysitter in the neighborhood.
What’s a single mom to do? In my case, it means having “company” only after M is asleep in bed, and not having anyone be here when she wakes up. That is hard to do and not have it be a rather one-dimensional relationship, to say the least. Not many decent guys are willing to go along with that for very long. I got really lucky; I experienced the perfect storm of knowing someone that I am already friends with, that has his own kids that are the same age, and who likes me enough to be a fun, genuine person in the little time we have.

My daughter knows this guy, and plays with his kids when we all get together with our other friends, but she doesn’t have a clue that he and I have been seeing each other. To her, this guy is just one of the other Dads at the Bronco games. I like it that way.

I don’t have any idea whether this delightful interlude will go on for a while. I hope so, but I am realistic. My imagination might be all over the place, but my feet are on the ground. If this ends tomorrow, I will miss him, but life as we know it here at Casa Mountain Home will go on as usual.
It’s the way it is.